2.19.2008

Non-intellectual to-do list, inspired by my desire to never again be in the financial position in which Teaching College has put me

* Update academic CV to reflect recent events (Wilde lecture, invitation to contribute to an online jounrnal, expected date of M. Phil, pending my passing my orals)

* Contact guy at Not My School's writing program with new CV and gentle prodding about getting on their schedule

* Update non-academic resume (which I probably haven't done since 2004)

* Send non-academic resume to my friend D's husband and M's recruiter

* Hope that my own institution feels like reimbursing my MLA (!!!!, to use the technique of my students) expenses this week so I can at least start looking for flights to Toronto

* Print tax forms and do taxes. At least I made such little money last year that I should get at least a little bit of money back.

This is possibly my least favorite position to be in. I have tried to structure my life so that, even if I didn't have a lot of money, I at least didn't have to worry about it. That kind of got shot to hell last year with the breakup and moves, lost security deposits, and the like. I paid off my entire part of the rent I shared with the ex in our old place--it would be nice to think that he would follow through on a promise to pay some of that back, but I'm not holding my breath. And now I see that, no matter how much I love my students, I would be better off not teaching this semester, given all the stress it's caused, stress that takes away from the real business of reading. And it makes everything feel worse because it's just one more place where, no matter how much I try, I fail to even achieve a modicum of personal success.

Perversely, I'm sure this mood will translate into an excellent teaching day.

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